September 5th, 2008 8:49 p.m.

May may is an important phrase to know in Tibetan. It means enough. You will be fed until you burst and given tea until you are a giant water balloon unless you know this term. And also put your hand in front of your tea cup or plate when you say it for extra emphasis. They all laugh when I say it now. I kept telling them I wouldn’t fit onto the plane with the way they were feeding me. Course to them that would be a great thing. Being fat means you are wealthy and feeding your guests well is very important.

Interesting thing about food here. Dechen will cook me or have someone cook me anything I want. Now that they know I love sweet tea, they make it for me in the afternoon. Like a gallon of it. Told you, I’m a princess, hehehe.

Very interesting how they treat special guests. Anna is a nun here. Nuns are below even the youngest monks. Which I know can be a little difficult for Western nuns, but she handles it well. I’m not below the monks, not even the master. The master is the highest monk leading puja and when Lama-la isn’t leading it then a particular monk does. I can’t remember his name, something like Kenpo. Not sure though. Of course, Lama-la is always above me… thank goodness!!! Now that would be just weird!!!

So at breakfast, I usually eat with the monks so as to stay out of the way of Lama-la and his work. Not because I’m asked to, it just feels right. When I come into the monks dining hall, all monks step out of line until I fill my plate. And then they won’t sit with me. Because that would mean I am on the same level as they are and I’m not as the honored guest of Lama-la.

Tonight, a Tibetan couple joined Lama-la for dinner. I don’t think they were invited. It seems that the majority of the nights someone sneaks past the gates (which are locked at 7 p.m. or earlier depending on how tired Lama-la is) and invites themselves to dinner. Quite frustrating when I can see how tired my Rinpoche is!

Well at dinner, I was given what Lama-la was eating. The family wasn’t given quite as many choices. The Tibetan couple was given even less choices.

So Tibetan names: Rinpoche means precious one. It is an honorary title given to someone by their students. Also, I am now coming to the understanding that it also means someone who has been discovered as a reincarnated enlightened one. Lama simply means someone who has completed a 3 year retreat. –la at the end of a name means precious little one. So Lama Wangdu may be called Lama, Lama-la, Rinpoche, Guru, and any sort of combination. In the U.S., I often hear Lama Wangdu being called Lama-la. Here in Nepal, he is most often called Rinpoche.

So this means Lama Wangdu was an enlightened one in a previous life. He is Padampa Sangye reincarnate. Padampa Sangye, along with Machig Lapdron, created the Chod practice. Padampa Sangye was the reincarnate of Guru Rinpoche or Padmasambadvah (don’t think I spelled that correctly but too tired to get up and check the spelling). Guru Rinpoche was an Indian master that successfully brought Buddhism to Tibet. He is highly revered and is considered the second Buddha. (The ultra light Cliff notes version).

So the Chod. This is Lama-la’s life work. The Chod is a Tibetan Buddhist practice that highly resonates with shamanism. It is a ritual (puja) in which the participants offer their bodies up to the demons within and the demons without so that they can be fed and be satisfied and ultimately transform or cross over. Powerful, powerful stuff! Like oh my gods, I had no idea! I mean I did. I was fortunate to meet Lama-la in May 2008. When my teacher, Betsy Bergstrom, organized a Chod training session I seriously had my check in the mail to her the next day. I knew this beautiful man was part of my path. Instantly. I bawled and bawled through the first puja I attended with him.

Speaking of which, we had the honor of having Rinpoche lead a puja today. That doesn’t happen here very often as he is usually so, so busy with people. I didn’t have the text for the puja. For my friends that have attended Chod pujas before, this one was way different than the other ones I’ve seen so far.

One of the older monks and several of the younger monks got to run around at specific times of the puja. 2 of the monks beat everything they saw, including us (and quite soundly), with either a leather bag (filled with bricks I am sure) and long strips of hair (maybe yak?) and the others carried sacred tools like the purba. It was so cute watching them running around the monastery whooping and hollering and beating each other, lol!

Another monkey got in today. This time while we were all in puja. He got into Lama-la’s reception room and was gorging on a big bowl of apples. I ran after Rinpoche trying to take a picture as he chased it while whacking a stick on the ground, but the monkey ducked around a corner outside right before I could snap it. So cool and so scary!

So sometime soon, was supposed to happen today, but with an unplanned pretty much all day puja it didn’t happen, Lama-la wants to teach me Yeshe Tsogyal (again sorry about the likely spelling errors) mantra. I am super excited as I have been waiting (patiently, of course, hehehe) for some teachings and while it isn’t one I asked for it will absolutely be better for me.

Ok, so I was sooooo tired today. I got up, did morning puja, ate breakfast, asked Anna too many questions and then headed to the stupa with her to pick up some things, got on the internet and chatted with Tim, uploaded some pictures (now don’t go harassing me over the amount of pictures I upload. I think I uploaded about 5 in an hour!), window shopped some things that unfortunately won’t be coming home with me (for some reason I can’t buy everything on this trip hehehe), had lunch with Rinpoche, and then laid down to sleep. About 30 minutes after I fell asleep I flew out of bed as my room was filling with smoke. Ani burns huge bowls (like larger than any bowl I own) of incense on the veranda outside my room. Usually this is only in the morning so it doesn’t disturb me, but I thought my room was on fire. I decided to get up and headed downstairs where they were finishing up the protection cords. Dang it!

So baby, I asked and I looked and I know what’s in everything. In the metal locket are various substances like an incense but it is a blessing powder (but rough cut not powdered, hehe) that smells heavily of camphor. Lama-la prays over all the elements of the protection cords for 6 months. Then the ‘powder’ is packaged up and put into the locket. I got to help assemble to protection cords. I love it!

The Tibetans here are beginning to feel comfortable around me. After teasing Dechen’s dad yesterday he has been teasing me all day. Yesterday he was trying to talk to me through miming things. I thought maybe he was acting like a chicken which was totally funny to everyone as he was trying to ask me about my flights here. Hehehe. So I started to bock at him from time to time and he thinks it is so funny.

Ani is trying to learn some English. More like she is trying to learn her ABCs. But today she thought she would be funny and she said “Kusan is my pet.” LOL! Even funnier when it comes from someone who works like a dog around here and I’m just finally getting her to make eye contact with me from time to time. She makes sure she stays lower than Lama-la at all times even if that means sinking into the ground.

So I learned something about my name. It isn’t Kusan. It is Kunsan. And it is the name of one of the Buddhas although he is usually called by his long name. Don’t ask and don’t ask about how they go about abbreviating the names. Anna explained it to me and I didn’t understand afterwards, lol!

I finished my booklet on Altar setups and read the booklet on the Medicine Buddha. Oh. My. Gods. Medicine Buddha rocks. Rocks hard! As in, absolutely will come to play a part in my practice in some way! Rock on Medicine Buddha.

Medicine Buddha. Medicine Buddha. Medicine Buddha. The Buddhist believe that everyone and everything will be liberated from the 3 lower worlds of suffering from just hearing the name Medicine Buddha.

Medicine Buddha. Medicine Buddha. Medicine Buddha. Medicine Buddha. Medicine Buddha. Medicine Buddha. Medicine Buddha. Medicine Buddha. Medicine Buddha.

I think it is about bedtime for me. The melantonin is really helping, but it knocks me out pretty fast. As in a took it when I started typing this and now I’m having troubles keeping my eyes open. Pray for good sleeps. It feels like 90 degrees in my room and the fan in here does not help!!!

Medicine Buddha!