September 25, 2008 9:06 p.m.

So let’s see. What shall I tell you about today? Let’s start off with my day! It was wonderful. Of course! I received my mantras from Lama-la today. They have to do with healing others, but not really the sort of healing you would think of right away… well except for one of them.

One is for when a woman is having troubles with delivery, one is for business, one draws people, one is for fire problems, one is for water problems, and one is for romance. Pretty awesome stuff! And I received a lung for a Medicine Buddha mantra. Yeah for Medicine Buddha!

Tinley was an excellent translator and I understand the practice so much more. Yeah for Tinley!

I am beginning to understand Tibetan Buddhism a bit more as time goes by. Beginning is a good word as this is something one can study their entire lifetime and still not know much. I have never met a system or spirituality that was so complex. It is hard to put words around it.

Sort of like Paul. He is a Russian man who has studied Tibetan Buddhism for 3 years now. He came to a realization that he still knows nothing so has come here to study. He has tried to get information from me, but I told him that I only really learned about Tibetan Buddhism in May… so not much help. Hehehe.

Um, let’s see. Oh, I am fat. That’s a really good thing here, but I’m not fat enough yet so they are trying their best. I’ve had a couple people tell me I’m fat. Which is a compliment here. If you are fat that means you have enough money to eat more than you should which means you are rich. A good thing here. It’s funny to be called fat and for you to take it as a compliment.

Tom jokes that they are all Jewish Tibetan grandmothers here. Tom is still gone, but I was talking to Const about that today. He said that was unfortunately true. The Tibetans are the Jews of Asia. They are very smart business people wherever they go so they are persecuted for it. He said that the Nepalese people are getting tired of it and it will only get worse. He said the Nepali people look around, in their poverty, and see great castles wherever they look. These castles are the monasteries of the Tibetan people.

Today I was given a paper on more Tibetan demonstrations that will be happening tomorrow and on the 30th. I can’t help but worry about the demonstrators after the last failed demonstration. Reminds me so much of the Jews. A people without a land to call their own. Hitler this time around is a bit bigger with few that can stand up to it. I’m speaking of China. The U.S. cannot afford a war with China and I can think of no others that would be willing to stand against China either. Talk about an education I’m receiving, in more ways than one!

Today I picked up a few more things, they will either be Christmas presents or they will be things to sell in the Center. We’ll see. Jewelry pieces. Tomorrow, hopefully, I will see about purchasing some malas for the Center to resell.

Dechen invited me out to lunch tomorrow. This means I get to go with her and buy her lunch. She is such a little devil. We joke constantly. My favorite thing to do to her now is torment her with rubber bands. Hehehe. She calls me ‘pakpa’ all the time. She says it all derogatory too. Well today, Const told me that it means the curls of Buddha’s hair and I found out she’s calling me that cuz my hair looks the same. He said it isn’t derogatory. I told him that any name can be derogatory depending on how you say it and he thought for a moment and then agreed. Especially after he heard Dechen call me it. Sort of like how some people say hello to me out on the street. I thought they were being so nice to me. Then Anna told me that some of the people were not being nice at all.

So, I’m a dork. I took refuge with Lama-la before he left for Nepal. There were assumptions made. Like since I was taking refuge I knew that I should be saying a refuge mantra. Ha! Today I was like, what refuge mantra? They were like, the one you’ve been saying… *Clears throat* I don’t believe I’ve been saying one. So after clarification and receiving of the refuge mantra Anna tells me that it wasn’t given to me as it was assumed I would know to say it after taking refuge. Yeah, right, like I would know anything. I feel like a total dunce here. I have to tell everyone I have no clue what they are talking about all the time. It’s not like there is a cliff notes version to Tibetan Buddhism. If I could write one I would be rich. But to be rich in America, you don’t need to be fat. I explained that today to Ani.

Tomorrow Anna is taking me to Tomel to pick up my thankga and hopefully drop off the other one. We are hoping they will deliver it to me so that I don’t have to spend more time picking it up. Time is getting critical here. I’m hoping maybe to have time for shopping for a carpet tomorrow as well.

I now understand, or think I understand, what my daily practice is. Practice is your meditations, mantras, and focus as you weave your way through Tibetan Buddhism. I hope to have some time to talk to Lama-la about Bodhisattva and Nakma before I leave. If not, it’s ok as he said that we would talk more once he arrives in the U.S. He will be giving me more stuff to do once he gets there and I’ve had some time to work on what he just gave me.

This stuff is so complex that it really frustrates me. It is difficult to know where to begin. Or where to begin to even learn things. I need to find a local teacher or ten when I get home. Maybe someone that can hold my hand. Help me to learn to crawl and then walk. Seriously!

Um, don’t really have more to say. Super tired and should go to bed since I have to be up in about 6 hours. The pace here is grueling and I don’t even have to work. Americans are so lazy. Ok, so maybe it’s just me that is lazy. This schedule is super crazy and I’m not a monk. Could you imagine? I would be beaten daily for my laziness. I go to bed earlier than anyone else. I’m not one of the first ones up and even when I am it isn’t by much. Some days I take a nap. I only do puja in the morning and evening. Not all day long like the monks. I don’t serve tea all day. Although I would love to. I get so thrilled when Lama-la asks me to pour his tea. Really only Dechen does it for him. And he’s only asked me to do it twice. There is something so spiritual and magickal about serving my Lama. No words really!

So, I’m blabbering on and on. I need to go to bed. See, I’m trying my best to blabber more. Good night! Seriously… I need to go to bed. So, um… night ya’ll.